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Where is the Empathy?


Sometimes while going through news articles or social media feed, I wonder what happened to us humans? How did we lose the ability to feel empathy?

I am a proud Mumbaikar, born and raised here. I proudly say that this is one place where people will be least interested in your private life. They will mind their own business. But give a shout out, if you need something and the Mumbai spirit will answer. We go out of our way to show our empathy.

I hesitate to make these type of statements these days. Are we really like that still? I hesitate to give an honest answer in my own head.

The old days were mainly about face to face conversations. Moms taught their children, "If you don't have anything nice to say, say nothing." We would be largely nice and if we had to confront each other, it would be done in a civilized manner. People who didn't like each other or were constantly quarelling would try to avoid each other to prevent major issues. People would even file lawsuits, but still would maintain a civilized decorum.

Not anymore. Now we have trolls. The internet has given us so much anonymity, the freedom has gone to our heads! If I saw a lady with a precocious child in a public place before the internet age, I would feel whatever I felt, depending on the situation. But this would stay in my head. Thoughts like, "poor woman, why is she travelling alone with baggage and child? Has nobody accompanied her?", or ,"this child is really spoilt!", or, "get me out of here, I don't like screaming children!" - they would all be screamed inside my head. Because these are offensive to other people, no matter how justified they feel to myself. We don't say such things out loud to strangers. It is rude, insensitive, judgemental, not to mention - none of our bloody business!

What do we do today? We say all these things out loud as comments on random posts. Because there are no repercussions as there are no physical confrontations with the actual person. We will record a video of this lady and her child or take their picture, without their consent, and post it on social media. We will tell people to share it far and wide and shame them for whatever we imagined they did. Why? Because we can get away with it, that's why!

Why else are people like Omprakash and Dhinchak Pooja so famous (or infamous)? Anybody can post anything online and people will make it viral. Even if we are sharing things to laugh at them and mock them, they are the ones having the last laugh. The more you share, and spread the news, the more they get fame. It may be short lived, but it has garnered them enough revenue.

What are news media outlets doing these days? They only write articles and make news videos which can become viral. If a news story doesn't have potential of becoming viral, it will not be given any importance. Responsible journalism has been throttled systematically.

We are all now as good as zombies. What gets viral on the internet becomes our reality. We no longer question. We are like the rats following the pied piper of Hamlin. Whatever trends on social media, we will believe it. Rationality, prudence, wisdom, values, practicality - all these have been sacrificed to make sure we are sharing the right content. I mean, everyone is on the bandwagon. Why should I be left out? Even if it makes me look like a complete fool.

Let's not mention common sense. That poor thing is dead and buried since quite some time now.

Call me old fashioned, I really don't care. I will continue to try and shake people out of their stupor and make them look at things objectively. Because I love my people. It pains to see what the majority have become. Let's stop hurting ourselves like this. Throw away the judgemental attitudes. Let's go back to that era when we knew how to handle conflict, and also how to avoid unnecessary conflict. Let's make the empathy flow back into our lives.

Let's stay humble. Let's be kind to one another.

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